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Title: Porno Star  
Reviewer: Nick Nite  
Overall rating: B
Female looks: n/a
Male looks: n/a
Sex: n/a
Plot/Acting: n/a
Extras: B
A/V Quality: n/a
 

Review:

John Lennon sang "I read the news today, oh boy," Ian Daniels thinks "I fucked some gash today, oh yeah!" This stylish, natural, semi-gonzo "day in the life" flick works exceedingly well at introducing us to new girls (and some we already know) via a day-long time-line and some cleverly digitized special effects. Now, normally I''m not much for such gimmicks; they''re artful, sure, but after a while they tend to distract from the heat on-screen. (I mean, if I want to see slo-mo, I''ll jerk off slower. If I want to see hardcore fucking, I don''t want it dragging its heels.) So I was a bit unsure as this one began with the statuesque Katie and stunning, all-natural Jessica traipsing in stuttering fast-motion (and black-and-white) wearing short-shorts up to Ian''s door to give him quite the romantic awakening. They undress quickly, and in fast edits they are instantly sucking his thick pole. Especially nice is Katie''s hard licking while Jessica positions her luscious ass right over Ian''s face. Lots of oral play continues until we see a title card (8:17 a.m., although his digital alarm clock reads 5:37 -- oops) and Ian is interrupted by phone calls. He''s late, as he and his stars will be perpetually for the rest of the flick. From here on out in this scene, Ian alternates between getting fellated while watching Katie suck Jessica''s incredible tits (why, in God''s name, was she not used more than this?!?) and calling up the sluts he''s going to use in his movie that day. Once he''s secured his talent, he gets back to being hoovered, as Jess deftly jerks him into Katie''s warm mouth. Whether he actually cums is debatable -- I think he did, but we''ll never know -- but it''s a decent scene all the same. (Still, why not pop off onto Katie''s cute-as-a-button face?) Two hours later (in movie time) and Ian is meeting up with Shawna Edwards for his flick''s first full-on fuck, with Shawna getting tag-teamed by Kyle Stone and Joey Edwards. Shawna, who has a decent body (despite a huge tattoo above her trim that says "Joseph"), is fairly butt-ugly and is wise to have grown out that dark curly hair to hide more of her imperfections. This is the only let-down in the film, though it''s not altogether bad. (Shawna may not have the looks, but she can fuck the shit out of just about anyone.) A quick undressing of her tight silver pants and flimsy top results in her doing a little joint bone-slobbering, which is fair, but things really pick up once Joey takes her doggy style while she''s still chewing on Kyle''s full ball sack. Prior to the scene, Ian asks Shawna if she''d be up for a double-penetration. (The answer: Um ... duh!) So it''s no surprise that almost instantly Shawna is riding Joey reverse-cowgirl style right up her tight bunghole. Again, she''s just not much to look at (you like tiny tits and a horsie face? Dive in). There are some fine shots, though, of Joey''s slick, curvy member sliding in and out of her before a condomed Kyle enters her twat. The DP takes a little while to work up speed (Joey is buried in the process) but once it gets going it''s worth seeing every frame of. By now, Joey has had too much excitement and yanks out his prick to shoot goo all over Shawna''s belly. Kyle, however, needs far more, and enjoys Shawna riding his cock while she returns to mouthing Joey''s stiffie. The position shifts to a legs-pressed-back missionary with some cool dirty talk ("fuck me nice and hard") before it moves to Shawn stroking Kyle''s cum onto her nonexistent tits while Joey goes back to banging her from behind. Overall, nicely shot but not worth a repeat viewing. An hour later (again, in movie time), it''s Polish hottie Alexandra Nice''s turn to get banged, courtesy of Ian''s swollen swab. The lithe, lovely Alexandra, clad in tight denim shorts, sleeveless shirt and black pumps, starts things off with a meaty blowjob and, from there on out, refuses to let things ease up. In this scene and her next, with Alyssa Allure, she absolutely throws herself into the fucking with wild abandon, clearly needing all the dick and pussy she can get her hands on, her sandy brown hair getting more and more mussed as she goes along. (After a while, it looks like a slut version of the Jennifer Aniston ''do.) Her tiny tits sporting what must be inch-long hard nipples, Alexandra lays back for a full lapping by Ian, who quickly moves into some rear-entry action and some intense reverse-cowgirl moves that have Alexandra pounding his pud deep and hard. Everything here works -- the close-ups, the long shots, the odd angles, the tricks. And Ian is sure to get lots of insertion shots when he takes her missionary (and dig the adoring of her l-o-n-g legs) and side-spooning. At last, Alexandra gets the full beef injection up her rump, as cum and sweat runs down from her stuffed asshole to her thighs. That leads to more dick-sitting, with every bit of Ian crammed in her cavity, while Alexandra fingers her creamy cunt. The finale? Excellent: Alexandra''s Euroface coated with Ian''s sticky stuff. Of course, a vixenish slut like Alexandra needs far more sex than just one scene, so it''s no surprise to see her waiting for the curvier Alyssa Allure (yum!) to arrive. And man, does she ever -- within moments Alexandra has yanked out one of Alyssa''s full tits and is sucking as if a quart of milk were about to flow out. "You can bite," Alyssa says, "biting''s good" -- and the rest of us are dying to be Alexandra''s mouth. To be honest, Alyssa has looked better; she overdoes the make-up here, making her look oddly harsh. In fact, by the end of the scene, with her hair messed about and much of the make-up having worn off, she''s a thousand times sexier. But she''s got a real and very hot body, which Alexandra laps up with passion, eating her bushy pussy with relish. Alyssa returns the favor by having Alexandra straddle her face and wiggle, and here''s where the scene''s only drawback comes in -- this bit of face-sitting should have lasted a lot longer. Instead, there''s some cunt-slapping and ass-licking (very tasty) before Alyssa yanks out a big black dildo to ram into Alexandra, now pressed against a wall. They switch after a while, with Alyssa taking a full pounding from that mammoth toy, before Alexandra pulls out a white vibrator to jam up Alyssa''s hot ass. (Some excellent shots here of that round thing getting plugged and Alyssa''s nice legs spread wide.) It''s a long scene, no doubt, in fact probably too long. But it''s not without its merits. It''s now afternoon and time for blond cutie-pie Shelby Mine to nail Jonathan Morgan while some goofy rockabilly plays in the background. She strips in fast-motion, then plants her ass on the ground with her legs spread to give Jon a full show of her silky twat getting fingered. Jonathan, naturally, can''t hold back very long and is soon muff-diving with brute force, shaking her cunt and squeezing the life out of her ass. Shelby is so pleased with her performance, she hops to her knees and begins to suck his full length -- and that''s when we get to see Shelby''s only drawback. God, such a hot chick with such an amazingly real body, only to have a wicked tattoo the size of her ass across her lower back. Whatever. Guess some guy''s are into it. Me, it sorta ruins some of the scene. The rest is some very, VERY deep reverse cowgirl, with Shelby''s real tits bouncing nicely and her ass in great exposure, then some great doggy and spanking, with Ian capturing some great overhead shots. The full blast from Jon splashes across Shelby''s chin and cheeks. The final scene involves super-hot Lexi Ericksson, her blonde hair framing an adorable face and her sexy body hidden (at first) by a sheer white bodice with butt-floss panties. Here, Ian goes to town, licking and sucking and fucking and pounding Lexi in all manner of positions, and to her credit, she takes it like a trooper and seems to crave more. After the requisite cocksucking and muff-diving, which is nothing to fast-forward over (especially when Ian rolls her back onto her shoulders for some deep ass licking), Ian takes to fucking her hard with her legs pinned back by her head, making Lexi cream heavily over his thick prick. The doggy style here is outstanding, the reverse cowgirl better, and the side banging plenty intense. Only hindrance is that Ian seems to have shot his load earlier in the day, for his cumshot to Lexi''s waiting, pleasing face is nothing special. A stronger load would have made this scene downright incendiary. Still, the few drawbacks aside, this is prime polished-gonzo fucking and Ian''s many digitized tricks are kept in check at the most crucial moments. It''d be interesting to see what he can do with plot, but who cares? When he knows how to capture such steamy sex, that''s all he needs to do.  
 
 

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